Sunday 19 April 2009

the view from my high horse is foggy

why is it so much easier to judge people than it is just to accept them, or give them the benefit of the doubt?

It really pisses me off what a monstrous hyprocrite I can be sometimes.

I was in my local health foodstore/organic grocer. I was picking up a few items for dinner and a cake I am baking for nana's birthday. There was a junkie in the store stocking up big time on everything. Juice, fresh food, tea, cheese, nuts, rice, whatever, he was grabbing it. I took one look at him and thought what the hell are you doing in here mate?

I waited patiently behind him at the checkout. He was fumbling in his pockets for cash and then he asked to sign up for the store membership, so he could get a discount. First Name? Dragon. Last Name? Blue. Address? I'm in between places right now.

And in my head I'm venomously ranting - "Good luck you fucking junkie, as if these organic groceries are going to do anything for your health compared to the immense amounts of chemicals you injest with all the heroin/ice you consume daily. And where the hell are you going to cook these organic meals if you don't live anywhere? And who is going to believe your name is Dragon Blue?!"

As I was walking home with my purchases the realization of what an enormous hypocrite I had been dawned on me. Who I am to judge this guy, whom I know nothing about whatsoever. Do I like it when people judge me for what I look like? And how can I pretend that how I live my life is really any better than anyone else? Dragon's probably just trying to make a go of it, just like I am.

We're all just trying to make a go of it, and sometimes we slip up or make mistakes. It just annoys me that I am so quick to forget this fact and so fast to judge others when my own life is far from perfect. It's a lonely ride on my high horse.

1 comment:

Kaviare said...

Sometimes I am so shocked by the thoughts that just pop into my head. You know 'what else do you expect' 'why do I always get stuck behind slow Asians?' etc. horrid!!

The worst part is, they are on automatic, and most of the time I don't even notice them. How poisonous my own brain can be...

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